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The more you feed the selfishness, the bigger it grows. The more you think you deserve time to yourself, your desires, your hobbies and so forth and push your children and husbands off of the priority list - the more you get full of your self. Usually selfish people do not even see that they are - but others notice it in how they talk about their children, husbands and duties as a homemaker.
Not only does the one doing this hurt themselves but they also injure their husbands, children and the all around spirit of their own homes. The husband finds something else (or someone else) to engross himself in since the wife can't be bothered. The children act out with being disobedient yearning for attention because mom is too busy with her wants and desires. The home is forsaken and becomes a den for filth, laziness and clutter. All the while the mother/wife is sitting idly in the corner checking her myface and glorying in her self at the expense of her God-given duties.
These behaviors don't happen overnight, rather they are gradually introduced into your life one at a time. You get used to and start liking being without your children. You get used to and start liking not having to tend to or serve your husband. You get used to and start liking updating your myface 10 hours a day and letting the house go to waste. However, there is a remedy - its called repentance!
God first, others second and ME last. Take care of your walk with God first. Take care of your family second and then what's left is for you. This is the true source of personal happiness and peace within. It is also the way you can turn your chaotic home into one of a loving environment to where your children and husband will rise up and call you blessed. Oh yes, let's get back to FULL time roles of mothering, wifery and homemaking for the gospel's sake!